Don’t know why

After a few years of thinking I want to write a blog, I’m here and I realise I don’t know why. I’ve read about writing one, I’ve read business folk say it’s what started them on the road to success and I’ve read blogs on specific subjects. I don’t know what this is or if there’s an outcome I’m looking for. I do know the myriad forms of fear that stopped me; not good enough, not interesting enough, not clever enough, not anything enough, and more truthfully, and painfully, not perfect. Well, now I’ve admitted that to myself and you, I am just going to do it. With ease and imperfections.

Back to what for. Perhaps it’s about connection. I guess all writing is. Does it exist if no one else reads it? Well, yes I guess it does. I’ve written things, and they’ve all been for myself. I’ve been the one reading them later on. It’s been a way of connecting to parts of myself. Actually I’m realising that my motivation for writing is to connect with you, through the simplicity of sharing. If something I post touches you in some way, if you can relate to it, then I’ll be super glad.

By way of introducing the who I am today, I want to tell you about my day. I didn’t get up to see my children off to school. I did some writing about a ‘family constellation’ experience I had on Friday, and tried to do some on myself, popped to the shops which means a walk and an almost free coffee from Waitrose, (and like most days, had a big conversation with someone in aisle 3), set this up, set my massage table up and found my new client wandering the nearby streets. Post massage I booked a meeting with a couple who may want me as their birth doula, cooked dinner, and am writing this before getting a reflexology treatment, going to a school meeting, picking up the children I now have to look up to, and do the late dinner when everyone’s tired and grumpy and my contact lenses are murky. I think of myself as a sedate hippopotamus most days. Not this day.

I want to tell you about my three things a month thing, of which this is one. Next time. For now, I want to say thank you for reading thus far, and I look forward to reading about you 💜

 

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